I have been meaning to mow my lawn, but I've just been busy......for the last 4 years.

I live in a quiet neighborhood; almost all my neighbors are older retired couples.  It is a bit refreshing not to have to look out my windows every time I head a loud noise.  If anything, the neighbors are looking out the window at me. 'What is that, an eight-track player?  It's ok Gramps, I think your Oldsmobile is safe.'  One bad thing about my neighborhood, it seems that since everyone else is retired, they have all the time in the world to work on their houses, so everyone’s lawn is just immaculate.  I really don’t have the time to compete with that.  So I came up with a solution.  I bought a canon.  I put it in my front yard and aimed it directly at the neighbor’s house across the street.  So occasionally when he is out working on the house, I will go out and polish it.  'Keep up the hard work….I can take it out any time I want!'